Let us be clear on one thing, here: I cannot STAND the Bay City Rollers. The tartan apparel, the sparkling dental work, the cloying songs with lackluster production...how do I hate thee? Let me count the ways... Even in those relatively innocent days of the mid-to-late 1970s these guys were cloying to anyone over the age of 12. I am nonetheless giving "BAY CITY ROLLERS: The Definitive Collection" the five-star treatment. Why? Because it IS a definitive collection, and it does and has everything that a definitive collection retrospective should.

First of all, while these guys never had the success stateside that they had in Europe, they definitely had their legion of fans here, many of whom undoubtedly have little girls of their own who are swooning over such packages as the Backstreet Boys and N'Sync. And they will love this collection. It has everything. I can't imagine a BCR fan picking this up and wondering where this track is or that track is or why they left some favorite out. Because they didn't. It is all here and nicely shined up for CD.

The second reason is the liner notes. I am sick to death of retrospective and greatest hits compilations that throw songs on a CD and don't tell you a thing about the band or its history or who was shagging who for the 15 minutes that the band was famous. And it is all here. The whole history of the band. True, the liner notes do tend to inflate the BCR's place in musical history as teen idols (that other prefabricated band, The Monkees, preceded them by over a decade, and of course, who can forget Manudo?!) but what the hey. It is done correctly, for the most part. And I don't care if it's Fats Domino or Neil Young or Roky Erickson, it should be done correctly. With extensive notes. This CD does the job.

And what the heck? Even a stopped clock is right twice a day. I have to confess that the band's "Rock And Roll Love Letter" (a cover of the rawer, and better version by the Dirty Angels) and "I Only Want To Be With You" (a cover of the wonderful Dusty Springfield hit) had me guiltily setting the VCR on repeat mode. And the tune "Yesterday's Hero" is downright eerie. The boys knew what was coming for them, and put it out front.

While this is not a CD for anyone but a true fan, there are still some out there, and they will absolutely love it. Who knows? It might even spark a revival. And if it does, more power to 'em. As innocently obnoxious as these guys were, I'd rather be stuck in a subway car with them than with Rob Zombie. Even if I like his music better. Highly recommended for fans of the band.